Friday, February 10, 2012

more from Grammy


Ok - we left my Grammy's letter by her telling me that how he treats his parents and siblings...and I added specifically his mother...that these may be signs of how he may treat you.

 Here is how she ended her letter to me:

One thing I would also like to say, is don’t talk to your friends about your problems when you have them in your marriage.  This can only make it worse.

Another gem from her letter commented on today’s culture and how it affects marriages. 

Most generations after mine have had life much easier.  They are the “me” generation and don’t think they have to work for what they want.  We have made it so easy for them and the minute a problem arises, they are not willing to work on it.

She reminded me of a conversation I recently had with a friend.  When we work hard on something or for something, we tend to take better care of it.  Like when a child saves his money for a toy, a book, something he really wants; he tends to take better care of it than if mom or dad had bought it for him.  This is how we treat our marriages sometimes, as if they are disposable or replaceable.  But they are most definitely neither disposable nor replaceable; nothing is more worth fighting for than your marriage! 

One way to be the “me” generation, and make it a good thing would be to be the generation who chooses to work on ME first, and try to make Me the best spouse I can be for my husband/wife.  If we can switch the focus from give me, make me feel, make me happy, to how can I make you happy, what can I do for you; perhaps our marriages would be a happier place to hang out.  If we all tried to fix ourselves instead of fixing/changing our spouses, I think our marriages and relationships at large would be much more fulfilling.

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